Dan and Cheryl Burton are the most amazing people you will ever meet. Dan left a successful business to be a church planter in Snellville, GA. He went through an amazing 15 years of service to see a lot of good, experience a lot of struggles, and, ultimately, to leave and close-down the work. In this time, Cheryl developed breast-cancer and through God’s grace survived. This is a story that is not unique. What is unique is that they walked through all of this without a drop of bitterness staining their souls. The longer I am in ministry the more I view this with absolute astonishment. Working with people means bruises, disagreement, disappointment, even betrayal at times. To come through with a joyful, Christ-focused heart yet without a moronic/vacuous denial of hard times and deep wounds is stunning.
As we began our transition as a church, Dan and Cheryl talked with us about our vision, our heart. Much to my surprise and shock, they decided to come along side and help us. Well, more than help actually. They came along side, took our hands, and showed us how to do what we longed to do. Cheryl took us into mobile home parks to do “Good News Clubs” and vacation bible school. Cheryl anchors our Sunday school in the gospel message, and has an uncanny knack for talking with kids at their level about spiritual things. She is a dedicated participant in our after-school program who loves and is devoted to the students in her care.
A few weeks ago I got to see Cheryl do an amazing thing.
The after-school program is pretty rough-and-tumble. The kids are not always polite, nice, nor do they abide by the Marquis of Queensberry’s rules. Cheryl was cleaning up after the program and was reaching for a rubber-band for some flash cards, but it was gone. There was a young boy standing there who had a rubber-band around his wrist. This particular third grader is one of the rougher of our crowd. He’s a good kid, but lives in tough circumstances and doesn’t always have great self-control. Anyway, Cheryl asked him for her rubber-band. He told her the one on his wrist was his. She didn’t believe him and told him so.
This kid was crushed. He dropped is head, slumped his shoulders, and walked dejectedly towards his apartment. Cheryl felt bad, but also knew that you had to loving confront things and not just let kids get by with bad behavior. Then she found the rubber band.
She was crushed.
She called me to go to this kids apartment. She went by but no one was home. She tried a second time, but no one was home. The next after-school day she asked me to go with her to try again. So we went to the apartment and saw that they were home. I watched and prayed as Cheryl walked up the stairs and knocked on the door. She introduced herself to the mom and asked to talk with the young boy. He came out, and Cheryl got down and told him what she had learned. She confessed her sin as sin, and humbly, truly asked for his forgiveness by talking about what it must have felt like to be falsely accused. The boy looked up, nodded. Smiled. And gave her a huge hug. She brought him a candy bar as a peace offering. He took it, ran inside and brought her something of his. I don’t remember what. A soda I think.
Here is the cool part. This kid lights up when Cheryl is around. She has such an influence in his life and his families life. Cheryl learned that the mother was also a cancer survivor, but is still struggling with the after-effects of her treatment. So Cheryl has made another friend.
I was talking with Cheryl two weeks ago, and she saw the mother walking by the ministry center. Cheryl dropped me like a hot-potato to run out and catch up with her friend.
All of this because she had the character to walk the way our Lord requires us to walk (live). Not perfectly or without error, but in forgiveness and honesty and integrity. Because she admitted her sin and did the right thing, there is a stronger relationship and gospel witness. This boy and his family knows more about God’s forgiveness and grace because of Cheryl’s example than from any presentation or explanation of the gospel that I could ever preach.
This last week Cheryl was re-admitted to the hospital with a brain tumor.
The prognosis is good. She and Dan are up-beat. The doctors are too. We will go and be with them for the surgery on Thursday. We – the whole fellowship that is Open Table – will stand with the family and clean, pray, feed, as they walk through this trial.
But what I realized on Sunday when we got word of the tumor was that Cheryl Burton as a person is who we are praying to be as a congregation. Our lofty expression of covenantal practices are generosity, hospitality, forgiveness, and risk taking. Cheryl embodies these. Our commitment to children and community development are the very things she breaths and longs for and lives out. She does so with a past that carries a lot of baggage, yet she doesn’t lug them around. Instead she looks for the hand of grace, the miracle for today, the fullness of life as it comes today. And she prays. Man oh man, does this woman pray!
Cheryl isn’t perfect. Anyone that knows her knows that she can unload on you with a lot of very particular questions and high standards. She’s loving and gentle and tough.
Cheryl teaches us many things, and will continue to do so through the years. But what she teaches me most importantly right now is that what matters most is character. Plans, visions, ideas…all these are good. But God uses people of character. God develops character in people.
This is the great challenge, the real challenge, of being “missional.” It isn’t innovative programs, crowd-pleasing results, best selling books, and having others ask you for advice . It’s walking humbly with our God in obedience to the small things he puts in front of us. Any other kind of success is his perrogative, but it should never be our primary goal. It isn’t Cheryl’s goal. I don’t think it was Christ’s goal. And we’re imprinting off of them.
Pray for Cheryl. She has radiation after the surgery. She was great when we took our 4 and 5 year old to the hospital yesterday. Since they will see her with her head shaved and (eventually) without any hair we wanted them to see her and talk with her beforehand to help them with the transition. She was great with them.
To get back to my main point on success in mission: character in loving, humble obedience in the moment. Knowing God’s heart, which is clearly revealed in his word, and stepping out to the people he takes you to in loving them. It isn’t safe. It isn’t easy. It doesn’t happen because we are perfect and never make any mistakes. As Cheryl teaches us, it often results from the opposite of being mistake-free. But Cheryl also teaches us that this life-style of loving in generosity, hospitality, forgiveness, and risk taking is glorious!
Peace
FYI, Mirriam-Webster defines imprinting as: (noun): a rapid learning process that takes place early in the life of a social animal and establishes a behavior pattern (as recognition of and attraction to its own kind or a substitute). Go to www.m-w.com if you need more.
